I turn 30 tomorrow...that's right, the big 3-0...there, I said it. Now, I'm not pouting about it (well maybe a little) and I certainly am not worried that I have somehow lost my youth (no mid-life crisis here). But this birthday does have me comparing myself to a man who tried really hard to deny and defy his age. That's right, I'm talking about Mr. Belding.
Mr. Belding is the perfect example of someone always in search of staying "forever young." Perhaps the reason he became a principal to surround himself with teenagers. Unfortunately, his efforts often came across as pathetic. Remember how he showed up on the first day of school one year with a toupee? Or how he desperately tried to get on Casey Kasem's Dance Party (the sprain!) by touting his old DJ skills? Then there's my personal favorite when Belding has a fight with his wife and turns to students Zack and Slater for some male bonding because they too are in a spat with their girlfriends (did Slater really think Jessie would ever be okay with a Raider game as a going steady date?). It was comical to watch Belding pretend to be hip and cool around the students.
So how does any of this relate to teaching (besides Belding serving as an example of how NOT to age gracefully)? You see, Mr. Belding clearly showed that he wanted to be liked by the students. So he always tried to do things that would hopefully make him look cool in their eyes. That brings up a debate among teachers...is it necessary to be liked by your students?
I may be in the minority here, but I believe that there is a correlation between a teacher's likability and his/her effectiveness in the classroom. Think about it...if your students like you, won't they be more willing to do what you want them to do and put forth better effort (just like any relationship...there's some post-Valentine's Day advice for everyone). It also leads to a more positive attitude from your students because they enjoy your class, even if they might struggle. I even find that behavior issues go way down because students who like you don't feel it necessary to act up. Being liked doesn't mean that you have to make your class a party every day or super easy (yes kids would LOVE you if you didn't have homework or tests, but I'm not advocating that strategy). It also doesn't mean that you can never be tough on your students...you have to be willing to be disliked at times if necessary.
All it takes is a willingness to laugh at yourself, admit your mistakes, show kids that you care about them, open up about yourself, be flexible...basically all the things that you do to be liked by others in a friendship or romantic relationship! Its just sad to me to see teachers who maintain that rough and tough exterior and seem to relish in the "mean" reputation they've earned over the years. They seem to spend more effort on maintaining that image than trying to find ways to be better teachers. Students in credential programs are taught to be the "boss" as they manage their students and that they shouldn't "smile until Christmas." Really? As Dr. Phil would say..."How's that working out for you?" Its no surprise that students in those classes aren't willing to go the extra mile for the teacher, always seem disinterested, or worse, become serious behavior problems for the teacher.
My only apprehension about turning 30 tomorrow, is that I will lose a characteristic that made me "cool" in the eyes of my students. Being in my twenties, I was the young teacher! Students thought it was cool that I was close to their age and that I was younger than most of the older teachers they were used to. I lose that uniqueness starting tomorrow, and I admit...I will miss it. Hopefully my students like me for other reasons other than my age.
